My first time ever encountering a situation where someone had committed suicide was back in 10th grade. It was a few days before spring break, and I remember going home after school. The next day at school, my Math teacher walked into class and was really quiet. He started reading an email that they sent to all the teachers to read to their students. It said that there was a freshman that had taken his own life the afternoon before, right after school. A lot of kids were quiet that day, because they all knew him. I never had the chance to meet him, but the memory of the aftermath of him taking his own life is something that I think about every day.
A lot of his friends were devastated, and the school had pastors (it was a Lutheran school) and councilors on campus all day for students that wanted to talk. Kids were hit hard by this, but the people that I feel the most pain for are the kid’s parents. So much has happened in my life since 10th grade, all of that my parents experienced with me, or I called them to tell them, because I was away from home. But that kid finished his own life before it even started, and I could never imagine life being so bad that you want to end it on your own. It may be helpful for the person who is leaving, but the only side that I experienced is seeing those that are left behind.
If you are suffering with depression, self-harm, or are suicidal, I know that life may be hard now, but it will get better. There is no reason why you should not reach out to someone and say that you need help. TWLOHA is an amazing organization, and our doors are always open. There are councilors on campus. There is a hotline. There are doctors and hospitals. Do whatever you can, but please don’t take your own life, because there are people that care about you, and will miss you if you go.
Even though I never met that kid, I think about him all the time.
With love,
Remi Turok
TWLOHA Secretary
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